Embrace each day with an enthusiastic welcome, no matter how it looks.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009


I'm filling my voids with uselessness. I need to keep moving forward. I need to fill my time with things that are meaningful and productive. Sometimes, I just go through these periods of time. Where I daydream about what I want to do with my life. How I want to start a business, how I want to travel all over the world, how I want to be that girl that doesn't care that things aren't perfect. I look at other peoples lives and think, "Wow, they have the perfect life. I want what they have." But I can't live their lives. I need to live mine. I don't want to live this life dreaming about what it could be, how I think it should be. I want to live my life. Not just dream it.

It's funny how sometimes you can have someone around all the time and you don't realize how much they mean to you and how much they do for you until they are gone. When they are gone you have this funny weird emptiness. A lot of times it's not necessarily a person that you take for granite. It can be an experience a place, etc. When these things exit your lives they leave voids. Voids that you can try and fill with shallow meaningless things. But these things are don;t have the capacity to fill the voids in our hearts. These voids that are almost impossible to fill by yourself. Do you need another person to feel complete? I don't feel complete. I feel like their is something missing and I'm not sure if it's a person, a process, or a pathway that I'm missing but I think that I need to fill my void's with positive things. Then eventually I will find my pathway, which ever way it takes me. I need to wake up. I need to talk the talk and walk the walk. It's time to stop dreaming and live.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

California Dreamin'

These pictures are the start of my summer vacation! It was a blast! My family came up to pick me up from school and then we headed up to Jackson Hole, WY. Of course we had to stop around Driggs, ID to get a good picture in front of The Grand Tetons! There were many jokes made while passing by these tetons. If you can only imagine. Ha ha ha! Up in Jackson Hole we went to a dinner a show program. I honestly cannot remember the name of it but it could be compared to Medieval Times. But this was Medieval meets Mountain Man. It was definitely a blast. While we were finishing up our dinner the show began and out came...BuckWheat? I think was his name. Anyway, he was looking for a lover and Lucky me I got to be the lading lady of the night. Buckwheat proposed and just as we were about to marry he ran off chasing some Native Americans. So, I guess you could say I left my heart in Jackson Hole, WY. Ha ha ha... Actually I'm over it, he really wasn't so cute. It was so good to spend time with part of my Family. I love them so much!
To make my summer even better! My dear friend Juel came to visit with her two roommates, Francheska and Megan. They were such fun girls to have around. We, (My mom, Bekah and I) took them into the city of San Francisco! And it was quite the adventure... There were so many tourists there! We of course started them off with a warm bowl of Clam Chowder! Which was delicious. Then we headed over to the Cable Cars, but as we approached we noticed the line of DEATH! It was so long! So we decided to walk! WE walked from Fisherman's Wharf all the way to Union square. If anyone is familiar with the area... that is a long hill-y walk. However, we still managed to have a great time and we were able to ride the Cable cars back to Fisherman's Wharf. We hit up all the necessary Hotspots and finally got back home at 1:00 a.m.

L.A.!! Was such a BLAST! I headed down there with my good friend Sharyl. We went to spend little Jaime Nelson's 19th birthday with her! The first day and Jaime's birthday, Jaime wanted to go to the Beach. So we header over to Laguna Beach! It was so much fun we took too many pictures and tried so hard to get a tan which just, never really happens for me! ha ha. Anyway, afterwards we ate some lunch at a mexican restaurant and we decided to tell them it was Jaime's birthday. So as we were finishing up out comes a free birthday Flan! The only problem is that none of us liked Flan. I felt so bad though. They brought out this free flan to be nice. So I ate the flan and regretted it immediately afterwards. It was worth the stomach ache though. They were trying to be nice the least I could do was eat some of their Yucky flan, right? Anyway, so we were walking around and we saw a sign for Henna Tattoos! We all decided to get one! Sharyl got one on her foot and ankle, Jaime got one on her wrist, Heidi got one on her hip and I got one on my neck. After over an hour of not moving my neck so that I wouldn't ruin my henna tattoo, the stuff fell off and underneath was a very light henna tattoo that resembled a rash. It was ugly and it was very upsetting! Unfortunately, I couldn't go get it fixed since the Henna shop was an hour away. Oh WELL!! We live and we learn!
The other days of the trip was mostly centered around the Mall! ha ha ha! We had a blast we Jaime's family and went swimming for a long time one of the days. It came time to part and Jaime and her family went to Lake Powell while Sharyl and I went to CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE! She has a cousin that works there and was able to get us in for free! We had so so so much fun and after a few hours we had done everything we wanted and decided to head out! The problem was that we didn't want to go home yet. So we bought a map and chose a beach to go to. So we took the 5 to the 90 to the 1 and landed ourselves in Santa Monica California! Ahhh... It was beautiful! We just sat down on the beach and looked at the people surrounding us. Oh my heavens! Santa Monica has the most interesting people. The Homeless people are the best! The Homeless man who took the cake though was hilarious! He walked down onto the beach and dropped his trash back of aluminum cans down a few yards behind us. Then continued towards the water. He stood there for awhile arms out beckoning the waves towards him as he moved around with the water. Soon enough a huge waves came and engulfed him! he came floating, back up, to the top of the water and did not move for a while. Sharyl and I were almost positive he was dead. ha ha ha but sure enough he popped up and repeated that a few more times before coming back up and collapsing in the sand. He then rolled around covering his body from head to toe in Santa Monica Beach sand. And you know what!? That's the way to do it! If you're going to be a beach bum you might as well live it up to the fullest. Yunno? Anyway, After people watching and after the traffic died down we continued home again not returning until around 1:00 a.m. It was truly a perfect trip.

I am sad that summer is over but excited to start working and get back into things!